We started taking the volunteers to an English LDS sacrament meeting a couple weeks ago. I went the first week so I knew where the chapel was located. I went the next week after that so our volunteers would not get lost. I wasn't really expecting to go every week because well, I don't really want to but somehow I got wrapped into speaking in sacrament the following week. I wasn't all that comfortable about it, more so because I don't think I'm "allowed" to but, why not! Brother Martin just said to introduce myself and share where my testimony comes from. No big deal! I wasn't going to make a big deal about it and just do it. I still have a testimony of my Savior, my God, and the love they give me. Here's what I spoke about...
"Good afternoon. We were asked to introduce ourselves and share where our testimony comes from. So, my name is Kirstin Winters and I am from Utah. My testimony of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and our Heavenly Father began when my ancestors walked the long trek to Salt Lake City with other pioneers. My great great great aunt, Rebecca Burdick Winters, died while on the trek and although she was not able to make it to Utah, her remarkable story did. She has been a strong example of listening to our Heavenly Father and following the promptings of the Spirit.
I was born into an active LDS family in West Jordan, Utah and then raised in Mesquite, Nevada. I lived off of my parent’s testimony for years before I would allow myself to have a testimony that is my own. I followed the standards of my parents and church leaders up until I was 24 years old. At that time, I was a phlebotomist living in St. George, not married but watching everyone around me get married and have babies. I was going to a Young Single Adult ward, attending institute, and all activities because if I did that, I was told I would find a man to marry and start a family with. Well, that didn’t happen! I started to feel that there was more to life than this. I started to question everything I had known and lived for 24 years. But that’s just it, it was everything that I had known from being taught, not that I had found out for myself.
I moved to Salt Lake City and began a life that didn’t involve going to church every Sunday and making friends who were only of the LDS faith. It was time to step off my parent’s testimony and find out for myself what I believed in, what I truly valued, and what standards I would hold to be true. Although it has been an interesting journey with many lessons learned, I have never forgotten who I am, where I come from, and what I stand for. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me and he has never left my side. I know that He hears my prayers. I know that He knows the desires of my heart and through the Spirit; I can listen to promptings which leads me on the path that is set for me. I may have been inactive from the church but God has always been with me. I would like to share with you some recent moments where I knew God was with me and was leading me where I needed to be…
I had been a phlebotomist for 8 years but was yearning to do something more with my life. I went back to school at the University of Utah and at the age of 28, I earned a Bachelor’s degree in Human Development and Family Studies, after being rejected from the Social Work program, twice! I quit my job with Intermountain Healthcare just because. I had no other job lined up nor was I going to school. I just felt like I needed to, so I did. I was very much at peace with the decision and had no stress whatsoever of what I was going to do next. Hello early retirement! 1 month after quitting my full time job of 8 years, I experienced the most spiritual moment in my life. Because I had no job to get to come Monday morning, I was able to sit with my grandpa and hold his hand as he took his last breath. Witnessing a spirit leave its human flesh is indescribable. I feel very fortunate and honored to have been the one to share that moment with my grandpa. Because I was not working, I was able to be at my grandma’s side during the funeral process; the planning, obituary writing, picking out flowers, arranging food, talking to neighbors, answering phone calls, and putting the funeral program together. If anyone of you is from Utah and recognize the name Gene Fullmer, then you know what a big deal this funeral was!
After things had calmed down from the funeral, it was time to plan my next adventure. I knew I wanted to volunteer, travel the world, and spread my love wherever I was allowed to. I previously have been to Guatemala 3 times and Cambodia and Thailand on various volunteer projects. Because this was my passion, I looked into the Peace Corp. The application process got the best of me so; I looked into other non-profits around the world. A friend who had served with me in Guatemala mentioned that she did OSSO with her daughter years ago. I researched it and the special needs orphanage immediately touched my soul. That was it; I was going to Ecuador with OSSO for 10 weeks. I arrived in Ecuador August 18 with a departure date of October 30th. Well, as you can see, I never made it back home! The administrative assistant was down visiting the first of October and we were able to share a lot of great conversation together. I shared my volunteer experiences and what my life goals were. I simply shared my story with her. Well, with about 2 weeks left before I was going home, I received a phone call from the office in Idaho offering me to stay with OSSO in Ecuador as a Volunteer Director. Did I really just get my dream served to me on a silver platter? Ever since my first volunteer trip to Guatemala in 2009, my dream was to serve with a non-profit organization, internationally, and working with orphans.
Brothers and Sisters, you are looking at a dream come true! Life is funny; where it takes you, people you meet, and the trials it throws at you. Especially after being rejected from your dream, twice, I am still amazed and so blessed that I am here with all of you, doing what I love! Now I’m not a perfect example of a member of the LDS faith, but I hope I am an example of spreading love, showing compassion, and not judging a person for what they do or who they are. All things that Jesus Christ himself demonstrated. I know our Heavenly Father lives and loves me, and he loves all of you. I know each of us has a Spirit that guides us through this life. The moments I have shared with you would not be a part of my life if I had not listened to the Spirit. My testimony is based on listening to the Spirit and following those promptings with your whole heart and soul.
I was so inspired by Sister Bennett’s story last week. And she’s right. It may take more than just 1 contact to have someone interested in the church. Even for those who are members, it takes multiple contacts to strengthen one’s testimony. Sister Bennett, by sharing your story you have strengthen my own testimony and I thank you for that. It has been a blessing sharing a little bit of my story with you all, and I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen."
I felt like the talk went well and people were able to understand where I was coming from. I was doing pretty well preparing for it and even when I got to church but the second I hit the stand, I was so nervous! It's been years since I had stood at a pulpit! I started to cry once I got to the part about my grandpa. I cried over my grandpa's death when he first died but this time is was different. It was more of a cry over the spiritual experience I had encountered with his death. Once I started to cry I was done for. I even brought the girls to tears! Amy came to support which was special. After my talk they were all very inviting and non-judgmental which is always nice. (You never know with young Mormon girls!) It was a great opportunity and I'm happy I was able to share a little bit of my story!
Don't I look excited to speak in church?!
Christian, Laura, and Cristian were able to come with us which was fun! After church, I took Laura back to Casa E and Martin C. was outside with Bryan. I told them I had spoke in church and asked if they wanted to hear it. Bryan, of course, smiled his big smile! Bryan liked hearing my talk and smiled the whole time. He kept his hand on my leg, it was really precious! Martin however, judged me from the get go. The second I said I was inactive he was giving me looks of disapproval. He can be such a bum! It was really nice to share something personal with those boys and have them get to know me a little bit better.
"I Stand All Amazed"... there are no truer words!
